28 Oct

19:30

Treehouse NDSM

T.T. Neveritaweg 55-57, Amsterdam

An evening of personal storytelling exploring the theme of shame and guilt within non-monogamy. This event is for anyone curious about or experienced in polyamory and open relationships.

Poly Stories | Shame & Guilt

More info & tickets

ENM Storytelling Evenings

Theme: Shame & Guilt

You feel an urge so big, you either need to give in or be consumed by repressed desire. It’s a popular psychological concept: try not to think about something and it will become all that you think about.

Like two muscular bodies pressing up against each other or women’s voices dancing around one another - the attraction of same gender dynamics when a primary partnership is with someone of the opposite sex. Based on what society told you what is normal, you might feel shame for wanting. Maybe it’s the person you’ve reserved for late-night drinks in dim bars and lingerie turning into someone whose conversation topics are so magnetic you want to bring it into the daylight - like brunch with your parents.

Things that your partner does not have or can not give (either because it’s not who they are or because they’re not into it as much,) things that diverge from your original ethical nonmonogamy framework which have become new desires as things evolved, or things that feel scary and intimidating to your partner, which you may need for your ultimate fulfillment.

Even when you’re both poly/non-monogamous, ideas, wants, needs and points of discomfort for the people involved may differ. Here guilt often shows its face. Finding the balance between reassurance and security, and liberation as a sexual or romantic being is tricky. How do you ask for something that can bring temporary sadness to your partner, and infinite joy to yourself? When you want to confirm the other is giving you plenty, but you still want a little extra - and how to shake off internalised judgements, and focus on empowerment and exploration instead?

With the right toolkit, things can exist in parallel or slowly integrate in your relationship when everyone feels ready.

This is for you when:

This evening is for anyone: whether you’re just starting out or already experienced in non-monogamy/open relationships/polyamory.

Poly Stories

Poly Stories invites you in the exploration of the wondrous world of non-monogamy through personal storytelling: together navigating the edges and unpacking (moral) dilemmas. This evening is for everyone with a curiousity in the free shapes of love.

Expect inspiring stories with Q&A
The sharing of experiences and inspiration
Love's wisdom to take home

Each evening revolves around a central theme. We co-create the night together. There is space to talk to others, ask questions and bring in your own experiences.

Want to share a story yourself?

Would you like to share a story this evening or one of the upcoming ones? Send an email to suzanne@suzanneallegonda.nl

About the Organizer

Suzanne Allegonda is a relationship therapist specialized in non-monogamy. She has always been fascinated by human thinking and behavior. In her private practice she focuses on working with individuals and couples in ENM relationships. Over the past years, she has organized various lectures and workshops where philosophy, self-reflection and love and intimacy meet.

If you have a limited budget and would like to attend, please contact the organizer.